110 Physical fear contributes to survival; psychological fear can be crippling... Your doubt and mistrust toward someone you love is a mirror of your own belief that fear is necessary... That survival isn't posssible without defenses.
p 111 All of us were imprinted one of two ways: either the world is dangerous with moments of safety, or the world is safe with moments of danger.
p 114 Longfellow said: If a man or woman feels there is a price to pay for being loved, their whole sense of love is damaged. It has become confused as a transaction between winners and losers, in a game of competing needs.
p 116 Ego is founded on fear...the ego craves certainty...the ego prizes its own will above anyone else's..and wants to feel the certainty of right and wrong.
p 121 Projection always hides a feeling you don't want to look at.
p 140 (Life) has a purity that includes both love and sex. There is no division between them except in society's misguided conditioning...such is the promise of intimacy that it can deliver us into a place where experience of the spirit is genuine and undeniable.
p 170 The crucial times to let go are when you feel the strongest urge not to. We all hold tightest when our fear, anger, pride and distrust take over... these forces have no spiritual validity.
...Spirit has a good outcome for any situation if you can open yourself to it.
p 176 There is a law in the unconscious that whatever you avoid will come back, and the more you avoid it, the stronger its return.
p 177 Instead of telling yourself that your emotion is bad, ask it what it has to tell you.
p 184 Whenever you feel yourself having a reaction of judgement, rejection, or resistance, imagine the opposite. Instead of seeing an adversary, view your partner as totally on your side...at the level of spirit your beloved acts only from love, holding your highest good at heart.
... Resistance is like a wall holding back the flow of love...Love is the wave that brings forgiveness, kindness and trust from the level of spirit...
...Resistance is actually born of fear and fear comes from being deeply hurt in the past.
p 186 When you feel weak and frightened, the last thing you want is for someone else to see you that way... and you put on a mask that disguises how very much you want to be loved and understood... You aim your offense against the very person you really hope will love you.
p 189 Letting go is all that spirit needs in order to enter your life.
p 189 Surrender is not achieved until you surrender completely to your beloved. To accomplish this you must relinquish everything that deprevies you of love and nurture everything that comes from love.
p 191 Pain grows out of a state of separation; it is not created by what another person does to us. In a state of unity, the self would provide unconditional love, which means that no betrayal or abandonment could harm us.
p 199 When one is controlling, one of the following is at work in the unconscious: fear of rejection, fear of failure, fear of being wrong, fear of powerlessness, fear of being destroyed.
p 201 All fear is a projection from the past, and as long as these projections continue, you will keep generating fearful situations to accomodate them. What you fear has already occurred-- the threats you see.. are cast by your past...
...Ego is needy; spirit is not. The craving to possess and cling is what smothers love.
p 210 In the light of spirit, you are wholeness and therefore lack for nothing. In the eyes of spirit, you are always enough.
p 225 In spirit, in relationship, you only play. Your purpose is not to (merely) survive, but to express every grain of passion that love arouses in you.
p 270 (lack of passion)..the essential issue is not "I am bored with you" but "I am bored." By taking blame out of the equation, you also remove threat. This is important because you cannot help but fear anyone whom you are mentally attacking.
p 304 Love grows the more you talk about it, think about it and express it.
p 310 Love grows on the basis of giving.
p 311 Forgiveness in the heart comes aboaut when the walls of separation in the mind fail.
p 313 A heart that has learned to trust, can be at rest in the world.
p 325 There is someone who looks after us/ From behind the curtain./ In truth, we are not here,/ This is our shadow. ~Rumi
c. 1998 Three Rivers Press
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